Category Archives: Home Life

154 – The Hardest Part

Hands down, the hardest part of this stupid injury has been my incapacity to care for my daughter. When she is home, I am stressed out. Fortunately, we are incredibly blessed to have Bryan’s parents here in town to take her in during the week. It’s like we have shared custody, and we get her on the weekends. It’s weird, and my heart aches I miss her so much. But it’s necessary.

When you’re woken at 1 am to the sound of your child calling out, “Mummy! Mummy”, and all you can do is lay there, it’s not a surprise when you start feeling horrible. This happened last weekend and I spent 20 minutes in the middle of the night sobbing because I couldn’t go to her. Bryan went in to see her, of course, and she was fine, but it didn’t make me feel any better. Her room is so narrow and toytasctic, it wouldn’t be safe for me to go in there in the dark. Not to mention I’d have to wake Bryan up anyways to help me out of bed.

And Ginny. She is a wonderful girl, but gives Bryan so much more grief and sass than she does with me. This is so frustrating. Mine and Bryan’s patenting style is such that we are both the good cop and both the bad cop. We are both the disciplinarian parent and both the fun parent. Yet she continues to be a…well, a brat. And I try my darndest not to ‘backseat parent’ right  now, since I can’t get up to deal with stuff. It’s not helpful when you’re trying to deal with a kid only to have another her voice chiming in from across a room. So anyways, Ginny will defy Bryan, Bryan will get upset, and I will be stuck in my corner crying because I don’t know what to do. I spend a lot of time crying these days.

I feel so bad for Ginny. She just wants to be a kid and live her life and hang out with Mummy and Daddy. Instead, we pack her up and send her to Grandma’s house every week, and are not ourselves when she comes home. She wants so much to help when  she’s at home, but inevitably gets in the way. She wants to play but Bryan’s exhausted and it’s uncomfortable for me to get down on the floor with her. Her summer is so different than it should have been and I feel awful about it all the time. When I’m better, this kid is getting a well-deserved Ginny Appreciation Day. Despite the fact that being her mom has been really hard lately, she has definitely demonstrated her maturity in little spurts here and there. For example, any time she’s been forced to go to the hospital with us (which are long days), she has been anot absolute gem. From sitting patiently, to playing quietly, to being generally pleasant. I’m so proud of her.

Now the other hardest part: I miss MY mummy and daddy!! I’m not the type of gal who pines for her parents. I do usually generally miss them, but because we keep in touch and I know there’s always a prospect of a visit, I don’t get worked up about it. But right now? All I want is for my mom and dad to come sit on either side of me, put their arms around me, and tell me it’s all going to be ok. I’ve never missed them so much in my entire life, and it’s painful and of course it makes me cry pretty much every day. Fortunately at this point it’s just 4 more sleeps til my Mama comes to town and I cannot wait. There’s nothing quite like snuggling up next your mom and holding her hand.

I guess that’s it for this post. If there are bizarre typos, it’s because I composed this on my phone. Sorry if this was a downer, but sometimes you just gotta get the feels out!!

 

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124 – Updates

First Thing:
Potty training continues to go well. Ginny took to it like a champ. We get the occasional accident, of course, but she is so chill about it and never hides the fact from us. We’re still not ready to train her for nighttime and naptime yet, but I’m sure when the time comes, she’ll take it pretty well.

Second Thing:
I’m OBSESSED with tea. Here is a list of the teas I have in my cupboard, because I know you’re interested, obviously.
For the Tassimo –
– Tim Horton’s Steeped Tea
– Tetley Green Tea
In Tea Bags –
– Tetley Orange Pekoe
– Lipton – English Breakfast, Mint Green Tea
– Stash – Christmas Morning, White Christmas, Holiday Chai, Decaf Lemon and Ginger
– Twinnings – Pure Camomile, Honebush/mandarin/orange, Earl Grey, Goodnight Blend, Lemon and Ginger, English Breakfast
Loose Tea –
– DavidsTea – organic mother’s little helper, organic the skinny, jumpy monkey, strawberry rhubarb parfait
– Epicure – Creme de la creme Earl Grey
– NourishTea – Canadian Breakfast
– London Tea
– Earl Grey
– Taylor’s of Harrogate – Yorkshire Gold
– Tea Squared – Kombacha Detox, Imperial Earl Grey (and I recommend Breakfast in Paris)
I have a BIT of a problem. Seriously. I had to force myself to avert my eyes as I walked through the tea section at Sobey’s today. THEY WERE ALL ON SALE TOO! Ugh. Wanty want. I drink tea all the freaking time. And I just got a rad and ginormous Little Mermaid mug, plus a cute penguin steeper. I cannot wait until we live in a proper house and I can set up a little tea section in my kitchen to display all my little tins and such.

Third Thing:
I’ve got my art mojo back! Here are my latest creations:

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I just completed a major project, have a minor one to finish up, and then I’m happy to say that I will be putting NOTHING on my plate for quite some time, other than personal works like those above. I want to really hone my talent, and really develop my personal style which I can already feel evolving. Also, stay tuned for an upcoming post about personal progress in regards to art. Also also…I need to find a way to sell some of this stuff. I’m running out of paint real fast over here.

Fourth Thing:
I went shopping on Saturday and got some great deals. Literally any time I go shopping though, I ALWAYS get deals. I am magical like that. Example: Over the Christmas holidays I went shopping with my Ma and sister and ended up bringing home a Queen sized duvet cover for $20 – originally it was $80, I believe. Well…this past Saturday? I got a Twin size duvet cover (why do I need so many duvet covers? Bryan and I don’t share a blanket in bed, and my queen-size duvet kept hanging over the side and kinda tugging me with it, as well as tangling my sheets. I swapped to a twin and life has been wonderful.) for $20 again…MARKED DOWN FROM $180!!! First of all…$180 for a TWIN? That’s stupid. Second of all, it’s super pretty and will probably look fab in Ginny’s room one day. I also took advantage of Bath and Body Works and they’re ridiculous 10 for $35 soap sale and bought a buttload of soaps. I also got my Little Mermaid mug, plus 2 Game of Thrones mugs for a steal at HMV. All drinkware was buy 1 get 1 40% off. Score. What else what else. I don’t know, but I always feel so elated once I complete a successful afternoon of shopping.

Fifth Thing:
My sister had cable re-installed in the apartment, so that is super awesome. Cable is one of those things where when I have it, I love it, but if I don’t have it, then it’s really not a big deal. But yeah…I love it. Maybe I’ll do a post on my new fav shows because so much has changed since we got rid of cable!! I am also just BEYOND thrilled to have the Food Network back. I missed you, Rachel and Bobby and Alton and Guy and Nigella and Ree…time for me to get inspired!

Sixth Thing:
In regards to my mission to have bi-weekly menus done up all the time – this has been a TRULY successful venture. We have completed one full month and are just at the beginning of a new two week period right now, which I shopped for this afternoon. We got veggies and fruit out the wazoo – and I already have it ALL chopped and bagged for easier access for snacking and cooking. Ginny wants some cucumbers? BANG! Just toss a bag at her. Speaking of Ginny, I like to ask her if there’s anything she wants and she almost always exclusively lists off different veggies and fruits. She’s such a good girl. She also usually says McDonald’s, but can you blame her? I know it’s 12:20 am right now, but I would kill for a cheeseburger. Anyways, I’ve become a boss at grocery shopping and meal planning and now prep has been added to the repertoire and seeing all those baggies resting neatly in the fridge drawers really warms my heart. I strive to be an organized person, and while there are many areas where I need to really work, my kitchen is really doing absolutely fantastic. It’s a dinky, awkward kitchen, but I make it as functional as possible. Still, I absolutely 100% cannot wait to have a proper kitchen in a house that is MINE and where I can renovate so that it suits my needs.

Ok. That’s enough. I’m tired. My feet are cold. Gonna go put my icy toes on Bryan’s back and hope that some of his warmth has seeped over to my side of the bed. The downside to not sharing blankets, is I have to be responsible for my own warmth. The upside? Everything else. We started the separate blankets deal just a month or so into marriage, and it was one of the best decisions. Bryan is a human space heater, and I am a human icicle so him being under my 32 blankets was not practical, nor was it practical for me to be smushed up against his hot body all night, trying to steal his warmth (I mean that hot body comment in several ways *wink wink*). So anyways…the two blankets is something I always recommend to people because it’s awesome.

NOW I’M REALLY DONE! Seriously. Once the rambling floodgates open, they really just do not want to shut.

K BYE!

121 – Update Randomnicity

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So yeah. That’s me up there. Un-brushed hair, wearing my husband’s Assasin’s Creed shirt (it glows in the dark, btw). I dunno. Life has been weird lately.

I’ve been in such a rut for the past few months. Wonderful things have happened, and wonderful things are in store for us, but that is not necessarily the recipe for being 100% happy. My family is good. My home is good. The weather is good. I’m just blue.

How has this made an effect in my life?

I have done zero personal art in 2016. Zero. I do have a project in the works, but it’s not something I would have have done on my own. This is good! It’s good to be challenged artistically, and this will turn out super cool in the end. But…in my spare time, I haven’t even been doodling. None. Which is weird. So, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see when that finally picks up.

I’ve been feeling lousy in the parenting department. Now, I’m going to stop you right here. Do NOT say, “But Becca, you’re a GREAT mom!” I know this. I know that I provide my child with everything she needs, and some stuff she doesn’t. I make life fun for her. I give her so much love she doesn’t know what to do with it all. HECK! I’ve even finally POTTY TRAINED HER (more on that in another post)! But sometimes, no matter how well things are going, and certainly no matter how many times people compliment your parenting abilities, you still feel like a poop. Lately, I’ve been feeling like a poop. I’m positive every parent feels this way once in a while. Just gotta get through it. Having a child like Ginny, who is intelligent and kind and loves to show me love really helps.

I’ve been eating my feelings again. Ugh. Gotta stop. This blog is truly a testament to my failures in the food department. Every few months I make a sweeping declaring that things will change, but IT IS SOOO HARD!! Still. I am perpetually working on it, and will continue to do so. I’m not discouraged, just frustrated.

Now. On to other stuff.

My hair continues to grow. Obviously. It pleases me greatly whenever I brush it out after a shower, to see the length creeping down my chest. Pretty soon I’ll be at Mermaid Level, meaning I won’t need to wear a shirt anymore since my hair will hide the bazongas. I mean, I’ll still wear a shirt because it’s winter…but I will have the option not to.

Please realise that I’m kidding.

Hmm. What else to talk about. Well in July I’ll be standing up with my BFF at her wedding as her Maid of Honour. I’m pretty nervous for speech-making, and event planning, but I’m also very excited. The dresses are SMOKIN’, guys. We ladies are gonna look hawwwt. I’d like to shed a few inches for the wedding, which I think is a reasonable and attainable goal. My hope is to outshine the bride. Just kidddddding. She’s going to be STUNNING. I can’t wait to share the deets of the shower and bachelorette on here though. Hopefully after the wedding (if I remember to take photos). I have some pretty lofty, pinterest worthy ideas going on in this noggin of mine.

OH MY GOSH! I ALMOST FORGOT TO MENTION!! I quit biting my nails. Again. Haha. I’m a pro at quitting now. I’m just not a pro at staying quitted. I know that’s not a word. I don’t care.

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La la laaaa la la laaa laaaaaaaaaaa. What next what next.

My husband is probably the best guy ever.

My daughter is THE most awesome kid I’ve ever known. She’s hilarious and so much more brilliant than I could have ever imagined. You always hope you’ll have a smart kid, but I am just gobsmacked that I ended up with one of THE smartest kids ever. She can do a bit of simple addition now, can write 90% of her letters from memory, can read the words Cat and Fish, is a pro at writing her name, and can also type her name. Ginny is a natural at video games and computers, and is in love with the world of Peppa Pig.

Oh my gosh! And I registered her for pre-kindergarten! Whaaaaat! I know. Crazy that we’ve reached this point. Prayers and kind thoughts are VERY much appreciated, as we won’t know if she is accepted until June, and then we still have to officially register her in September. I’ll write more about the registration experience another day.

Well. I guess that’s it for today. Just felt like an update was in order. I know my rambly posts are liked, but I do hope to have a tad more structure next time. Toodles, y’all!

Sixty Seven

We’ve been playing outside. A lot. Well, I mean, if we had a backyard of our own we’d be playing outside much more, but compared to last year we have been going outside A Lot. Every single day for the past 2 weeks we have gone outside to the park, or just for a walk, and it feels AMAZING. I strap Ginny into the stroller, fill a bag with water and snacks and sometimes toys and colouring equipment, and off we go. My sister hasn’t found a job yet, so she joins us and we are just really having a blast these days.

I need to say this: I ADORE BEING OUTSIDE. Since leaving childhood, I’ve always found myself to be somewhat of an indoor cat (except at Camp), but lately I’ve just been craving the sunshine and fresh – albeit hot – air. I dropped that pantsize i gained recently! I have a mild and oddly placed sunburn! My freckles are out and proud! My skin issues are clearing up! It’s really quite marvelous.

It’s stupid hot in our apartment, but I am really thinking this is going to be a good summer. We already have plans to take Ginny to the waterparks once they open up, and I’m even thinking I’ll drive her myself one day while Bryan is at work! Now THAT is a miracle. I love the summer smell seeping into our home already; a mix of sunshine and grass and sun lotion. I’m just so happy right now.

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Sixty Two

Well, we officially have an injury under our belts. Ever since Ginny was born I have been dreading the day she gets hurt in a way that Mommy’s kisses can’t heal. Saturday night, she slept over at her grandparents’ house and fell out of bed during the night. This was a low bed, onto carpeted floor, so I’m assuming she caught her shoulder on the frame as she went down. Long story short, the poor kid broke her left collarbone. We picked her up to go to the hospital Sunday morning (no one realized how serious it was yet), and went home around lunchtime with a tiny girl wearing a tiny sling.

Ginny is an impressive force. As we waited in the ER, she sat quietly, snuggled on Daddy’s lap. She would smile and wink at me and let me give her water. When the nurse wanted to check her out before sending us to the kids ER, Ginny sat patiently as vitals were taken and a bracelet (which she refuses to take off now) was placed on her small arm. Again, she sat quietly and patiently as we awaited a doctor in the kids ER, and when he came Ginny did fuss a bit when we turned her so she could be examined properly, but then immediately calmed down and just let the nice doctor do his thing. She was delighted when the nurse came to give her some Advil (the kid LOVES medicine), and she sat very still for the Xray (which she still talks about). We were probably at the hospital for just shy of 2 hours? And little Ginny marched out on her own two feet, demanding that we taker her to “Army” because she had so been looking forward to church that morning.

How amazing is my little girl? Just a tough little cookie who didn’t let even a broken bone keep her from getting to church on Sunday. It’s been tough at home – a real test of my patience, stamina, and general parenting skills. Most of the time I don’t know what to do for her, but I do it anyways. When she wakes in the middle of the night because she thinks she’s a carrot…well I’ll just go right along with it. When she needs BOTH her music boxes turned on in order to sleep…I’ll turn them on. And I’ve mastered changing her diapers (I do so wish we were out of diapers by now…) while she is standing up so that I don’t have to disturb her shoulder laying her on the floor and picking her up again.

I’m on very little sleep right now, I have no idea when things will get back to normal, and I’m stressed out of my gourd with worry for Ginny and worry for how I will personally get through this. So there’s a lot of praying going on in this house, and a lot of tiny naps, and that pile of dishes has not shrunk much at all since Friday. However Ginny remains ever cheerful, though a little faded, and I’m glad to be her mom even if it is a very difficult position to be in right now.

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Fifty Six

I may not be a hoarder anymore, but I’m also certainly not a neat freak. I like stuff to be clean and tidy, but I frequently fall behind. The room that certainly suffers the most is mine and Bryan’s bedroom. First of all, we have very little storage in there. Our dresser has to be in our closet area which means we lose several feet of hanging space, and taking up even more of that space, is a necessary hanging organizer. One corner of the room is dominated by a desk, but hopefully soon we will be squeezing a second dresser next to it. On top of the lack of storage though…Bryan and I both just suck at remembering to put away our clean laundry. It sits folded in the laundry baskets until laundry day, when we hurriedly put what’s left into whatever nook or cranny we can find so we can refill the baskets with dirty clothes. Not an ideal situation. Eventually, we end up with clothes in the dresser, on the dresser, on the shelf, but mostly on the floor and at the foot of my side of the bed.

Today I cleaned the room though! No more clothes on the floor! And THIS TIME THIS TIME THIS TIME!!! we will KEEP IT THAT WAY. Please. Seriously, being able to walk without tripping on a mountain of t-shirts is just lovely. After sorting through all the clothes, putting them away, and compiling a bag of them for the thrift store, I then set to making my side of the bed area prettyish. So below are photos of my side of the bed, and also the storage situation and how I dealt with it today.

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Fifty Five

This is a post about stuff, and also about things.

First of all, let’s talk about how exhausted I’ve been lately. It’s been bad lately. For the past 5 days or so, Ginny has been really testing the limits of my patience. I don’t have a bad temper, but I have a fast temper, so it’s been a real test in my own self control, as well as how far I will go to remain steadfast in not letting Ginny get away with things. Basically, she has decided to not listen to us anymore. She’ll play nicely and quietly for a an hour or so, and then it’s time to clean up…and then a fight breaks out because she either refuses to clean up, or halfheartedly picks up one item while literally rolling her eyes at me and sighing, “Fiiiine.” So that’s fun! Plus, she refuses to just eat her dang food, which means I spend about an hour or so during lunch and dinner, trying to make her eat. I have been careful to serve her stuff that she loves too, just to keep the peace, but nope. In addition to these things, she has also been much more difficult at bedtime than usual, has quit having naps, and as a result she has mini-tantrums over silly things throughout the day (and when I say mini, I mean mini – as in the tantrum lasts maybe 15 seconds, which I can deal with!).

Dealing with all these little things, which individually would not normally matter but all together are a pain, has really been grating on me. I find myself quicker to snap at Ginny or yell, which I try to avoid as much as I possibly can. It’s so difficult to not be angry with her, when I know that she is only 2 years old and still learning. Not only that though, but she is a REALLY good kid. Doesn’t like to cry much, is typically well behaved, and loves us so much. So hopefully this bout of the terrible twos passes soon because I’m just so tired.

Next up: I made pork schnitzel last night for dinner and it was delish.

Also: I have been reading a lot lately, and I want to read more but here’s my problem: There is no space in my apartment to have all of my books unpacked, and when I about selecting a book to read I like to be able to see ALL of them, that I may choose the best one for the moment. But most of my books are in boxes 😦 So I only have a few shelves worth to choose from and it’s driving me insane, and I realize that this is a ridiculously insignificant problem to have, but I’ve rekindled my love affair with books so it’s important to me right now.

I guess that’s it for today. Today is my day off so I’m going to go either a) diddle around on Tumblr or b) lay down under a quilt and let the couch absorb me.

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Fifty Three

I don’t really have anything in particular to say today. Things have been going well lately. I’m not doing great with Operation Hawt Becca, but it’s early days yet so I’m not discouraged. My hair has finally grown long enough to pile into a messy bun and/or pony tail on the back of my head, which is relieving. No more static hair stuck to my face at all times!! Mainly, I’ve been enjoying my time with my Ginny and my Bryan and life has just been generally good. This year has lots of potential to be good, and that’s all I need. Here are some pictures (some I edited, some I did not):

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Fifty One

So, I hopped on the Nostalgia Train last night and it sure gave me a kick in the pants. I can’t believe how GOOD I looked at age 17. It makes sense…my metabolism was great, considering I survived on Salt and Vinegar chips, Coke, mac and cheese, and hot wings. My teenage years may have sucked socially, but physically I felt great. I wasn’t in shape, but I was at the right weight for my height. Clothes fit. I wasn’t embarrassed in a swimsuit. My physical self esteem was through the roof from ages 13-18. Girls at school were constantly down on themselves and I was always baffled, because really…are you ever going to look this good again? This young? Everyone was gorgeous in high school!

Anyways, seeing my body in particular was kind of like someone flicking me in the head and saying, “Why’d you let that go?” I think seeing what I was will be good inspiration. I’ll never get back down to 120, and that’s 100% with me. But if I work hard, I can shed some of these pounds and begin returning to my former glory. Seriously…I was a nerdy babe. I don’t care if it’s vain to be talking about myself this way. I was young, I was pretty. My face has changed a bit, but I love seeing how I’m aging, so now I just need to work to get that bod back. And I know it will be so worth it. So maybe I’ll pin up a picture of young, hawt Becca, and use that as inspiration to get on that exercise bike! To go out walking! To start doing some yoga on the regular! To stop eating those darn chips!

I CAN DO IT.

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Fifty

I can’t believe I made it to post numero fifty!! To celebrate (I guess…haha. When I came here to write this post I didn’t realize it was number 50) here is a re-purposing project I whipped up real quick this morning.

Our bathroom is massive. It’s also laid out in a non-functional way. The toilet paper is too far from the toilet, the linen closet is tucked into an almost un-reachable hidey hole, and there are not enough towel racks despite the acres of wall space. The biggest issue I have with our bathroom though, is the fact that there is no space for next-to-the-toilet storage which, as a woman, I find important at certain times of the month (although every one of us suffers from the fact that there’s nowhere to keep extra toilet paper where it’s the most useful).

For a long time, I kept my lady products in an old Winnie-the-Pooh wipey container on the back of the toilet. This is problematic for a couple reasons. A) what if some poor guy thinks there’s wipies in there, opens up to take one, and then BAM! TAMPONS! PADS! Oh, the horror. And reason B) it’s awkward to open, and I can’t fit too many items at a time.

So here is my solution:
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I took an empty dishwasher soap container, simply taped some fun scrapbook paper around it, and then voila! A handy-dandy place to keep all of my feminine hygiene products. The lid is easy to open, there’s enough space to keep a bit of everything, and it will look cute sitting on the back of the toilet (I would have snapped a photo of the container in its new home, but I just didn’t feel like cleaning the bathroom this morning).
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So that’s my teeny project of the day, and hopefully it will make my life in our ridiculous bathroom just that much better.

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